If friendships were valued in numbers, we’d all be rich in love - to prove this all we need is to look at any of our Facebook friendship numbers.
And yet, how many of us have felt lonely, misunderstood, alone in our parenting, and lost in our adult lives? Maybe even in your marriage? Stepping into vulnerability territory can feel both scary, and scared, all at once. Finding a tribe who reciprocates your openness, who sees you as the light you are in this world, who hears your struggles as well as your successes is a key to showing up as the wonder woman of your life story.
Have you ever viewed friendship, holding space for your soul sisters, gathering with women to be of service or a way to step into your power? How often do you hold a place on your calendar for being with those who see both your vulnerabilities and your strengths, who push you to go beyond your comfort zone so that you see beyond the veil of your self-beliefs and expand your conscious awareness to owning your greatest potential?
I was recently away with a friend for a work weekend, so we could set and cross off tangible goals we each have for our business. And that we did! (I even have a link to her podcast at the end of this because, it’s seriously banana split with a cherry on top so good!) Here’s the real deal though, I came home with so much more than a proudly checked off to-do list. I came home renewed, refreshed, excited about life. Because she said to me in not so many words, I see your greatness, I hear your fears, I won’t tell you to hide them but I will tell you that you are more than your fears.
When I went into my itty bitty shitty committee self-limiting talk, she looked at me and said, “Don’t talk to my friend Stephanie like that!”
Without limits she uplifted me as she shared knowing of my purpose. I was instructed, now go, do it. Get after it. The very same message she said to me this morning as I told her I was inspired to write but doing everything but…
As a women who used to have many acquaintances and not a lot of friends, I know as deep as most the hidden benefit of having surface level friendships. The will to not be emotionally hurt by others can be as strong as a the will of a mother to protect her child. It’s fierce, it’s powerful, and it keeps one safe, even if loneliness is the trade off.
Somewhere along the path to unconditional love however, this will to protect our heart from hurts learns our heart can heal from even the deepest hurts.
New opportunities appear and the will to protect seemingly begins to blend with the will to trust. To take on new life experiences and to open up to vulnerability. We learn through experiences we can either be hurt and angry, feeling unseen and unheard - or we can be open, honest, and to ask for our needs to be met. Then comes the breaking down of the shell that keeps us from showing others the truest us, the self that is unlike any other human being in the world and more magnificent than your wildest dreams.
The sacred truth.
That we can dream bigger.
That your dreams are meant be grounded onto this earthly plane.
Done in sisterhood, being cheered on every step of the way, with the women whom we share a sacred bond, soul contract of sorts.
To show up and serve your sacred sisters in this way only occurs when you allow them to serve you the same.
Because prosperity, abundance, life, and projected dreams happen when our soul sisters reflect back to us our hardships, when they open our eyes to new perspectives, when our hearts leap out of our bodies because someone in our sisterhood has inspired within us our own greatness.
Last night I had dinner with a friend and I didn’t get home until 3am. We were having those conversations that are so soul-filling, it’s hard to leave. She asked me the hard questions like, do you feel like your mothering your husband in this situation? To what are you desiring to be different in this moment in your life? Here is a soul sister who knows what it’s like walking a spiritual path in a technological world and who knows it’s critical to move beyond the not good enough subconscious patterns to be the wonder women of my own life story.
I came home in the late night hours with an even stronger commitment to up-leveling my own vulnerability in my marriage, with a new level of forgiveness of self and of others, with a deeper level of commitment to my own soul’s energy. Because we each showed up with open heart centers, with a willingness to share our stories - both the old ones we’ve told ourselves and the new ones we are writing, and because we showed up vulnerable to speak our truth without judgement of self or other. The payoff is a tired mama who feels as if I’m connected to the deepest of of all the energy - the motherly energy of the universe who is wrapping her arms around me and saying, you are enough.
As women, as mothers, this is what we want for our children. We desire to foster friendships with those who see them for who they are, who laugh with and lift them up, friends who will speak the truth in love. What we want so deeply for our children we also desire for ourselves. And the service piece of friendship is to show up and be mutually raw and real. To say to another, your light is greater than you know and I’m asking you to go on this journey of sacred sisterhood together so we may show up and do what our souls agreed to do; in integrity, holding the sacredness of the a bond that women share with women, parents share with children.
In case you're wondering, where do I begin, here are a few question suggestions to help you open the current conversations you’re having to go to new depths:
- What have you done recently that felt like complete luxury moment?
- What book have you recently listened to/read and what was the biggest ah-ha moment?
- If you could plan the perfect date with your spouse, what would that look like?
- Are you needing support with anything right now?
- What’s been lingering on your to-do list that you just don’t want to do?
- Do you know your love language? Do you feel like your partner know how to meet those needs and you his? Want to take the quiz together?
Wishing you much love and connection,
P.S. Author’s note: I have an amazing husband who is my greatest love. Soul sisterhood is simply a brilliant compliment to that love and heart energy.
Now over to YOU! What dreams are you holding onto for yourself and your family that you are ready to ground into your everyday life? How can we support your dreams?
Comment below or join the discussion in the Goddess in Everyday Clothing Facebook group.